I've also noticed that there tends to be, whether consciously or not, quite the effort on multiple fronts to restrict what is allowed to count as "fun" for us and it's typically restricted to very sanitized "family friendly" kinds of things.

On one hand, I've noticed as someone who has performed in many bars and clubs in multiple countries that these venues consistently make any kind of management of sensory needs essentially impossible and etiquette for both audience members and musicians is heavily policed in a rather insidious, passive aggressive way. On the musician side of things, I was also heavily pressured by my band's manager to never use hearing protection. It's a similar deal with most places primarily considered adult hangout spots.

On the other, I've observed that almost anything labeled as being some kind of "disability", "sensory friendly" or "autism" event, especially if it's not being organized by someone from that demographic, tends to assume I won't be there without some kind of parental accompaniment, typically doesn't serve alcohol, and offers only the musical equivalent of a BRAT diet. I also even once saw an ad for some kind of autism-specialized tour agency that explicitly prohibits sex during any of the trips.

What a miserable life it would be if I "stayed in my place".