You've failed to account for one kind of situation here, which my experience of being agender falls under, and based on my participation in queer spaces, I know I'm not alone. See, my brain took that internal detachment from gender to a whole other level. I don't just notice the silliness in gender roles, I struggle to allow myself to be gendered in a way that's incredibly foreign to cis people who play along in a detached way.

When it comes to bathrooms, I hate, I mean absolutely loathe being given two choices, so much so that I'll either put in the effort to seek out gender neutral bathrooms, waiting for people to get finished pooping and all, or will go in whichever bathroom smells the best and has the least people. As a kid, pre-everything medically, before I had the vocabulary to articulate what was happening and was still sometimes dressing pretty femininely, I'd frequently go in women's rooms, sometimes with my mom even, and set off some kind of visceral disgust and fear in more gendered cis women and they'd immediately start trying to kick me out of the bathroom/dressing room/what have you. This was in the 2nd largest US city by population.

I tried the idea of being a trans man for a while, but something about that didn't quite fit either and I didn't like he/him pronouns that much more than she/her pronouns. I started to also feel very wrong and out of place about participating in "women in STEM" kinds of things. Eventually, I got on low-dose T (which I plan to do intermittently) , got top surgery, changed my name to something gender-neutral, and changed my marker to X on all of my government documents. I've also explored non-standard bottom surgery options and possible ways to get around the HRT requirements. I've always wanted to be on the more androgynous side.

Something about my brain also doesn't feel fully onboard with existing in a human meat suit and I've spent a strangely long time imagining what it'd be like to become a variety of inanimate objects. My inner monologue also doesn't really have its own voice and I think my thoughts in whatever the last voice was that I heard and assemble a lot of my spontaneous speech out of a Frankenstinian patchwork of sound bites. I wouldn't say I have any of the otherkin/xenogender/BIID type stuff going on either.

Coincidentally, I'm also aro-ace and am on the fence about ever getting pregnant for a whole host of reasons, one of which is that in order to access care, I'd most likely have to be aggressively gendered as a woman the entire time.

I mean, it only makes sense that if people can feel like they belong in the body of the "opposite" gender, that you could fall in-between in your dysphoria.